Do you know what happens when you start a study called, “You Can Become a Saint?”
Well, I’ll tell you. You begin to get tested like I did when I started my study by that name. I think the devil said, “yeah right, you….. a saint?” And I started to doubt, and he made me start to lose confidence, and I got angry and flustered and it wasn’t pretty.
I started this study in June after two friends invited me. The first meeting was a piece of cake but I don’t remember it as well as the second meeting when my trouble began. By the second meeting I had read the first chapter of the book and had completed the workbook and felt on fire for this adventure I was to undertake.
When I arrived at the second meeting I was eager to share some new insights to the group of women after having read my chapter and praying and doing some of the suggested things from the books. I found, as we went around and reintroduced ourselves, that this was a group of dynamic and serious Catholic women. The problem I had was that I was one of the last to introduce myself and after listening to all those women, some 30-35 of them, I became intimidated. This was made worse by my cell phone which vibrated in my purse halfway through the introductions. As I walked out to take the call I overheard a woman talk of the loss of her son just two short years ago. Boy, was I mad to miss that dear woman’s whole introduction of herself.
The call was 15 year old Michaela calling to tell me that her brothers were being so naughty she didn‘t know what to do. And the main culprit was ten year old Cole. Their dad was enjoying his Church golf league that night and she was in charge. I had to spend a good amount of time calming her down and telling her what to do before going back to the meeting where I still had to introduce myself.
When I got back and when it was my turn, I could barely talk or make sense. Remember……I had something profound I wanted to say when I first walked into this meeting. I was able to say something like, "My 10 year old son, Cole, wants to be a priest and he is being naughty right now and that’s why I had to leave the room and priests are being persecuted in France right now and my one message is to Pray for Priests." But I was absolutely shaking and practically crying when I said this and when I was done my chest began to ache and I thought I was literally going to have a heart attack and then my stomach began to hurt and I got really nauseated. I thought I was going to die! This feeling had NEVER happened to me before.
But I managed to get up at the end of the meeting and as I was about to gather my friend that I carpooled with, my husband called me from the golf course. He lost the keys to his car and he needed me to come pick him up. I about died again. I had to explain this to my friend. The golf course was on the other side of town. Thankfully she found another ride. Halfway to the golf course my husband called me to tell me he found his keys. That devil was really meddling with my plan to become a saint. He was really working on my pride.
I was ready to quit this study. I accidentally missed the third meeting but had seriously considered not going anyways because of what had happened at the second meeting.
But I persevered and went to the 4th meeting and just this last weekend attended a wonderful retreat about the spirituality of Opus Dei which is the basis for the study “You Can Become a Saint.”
I’m so glad I stuck with it because it was a blessing and I hope to tell you in future posts some of the new things I have learned about “How to Become a Saint.”
The first thing I’ve learned is to persevere, leave your pride at the door, and never give up!
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